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LOUISA JEWELL’S BLOG
February 19, 2018

Your Weekly Juice Episode 31

Raising Confidence Children

Continuing with my theme of raising confident children, in today’s Weekly Juice I show you how to promote a growth mindset within your child versus a fixed mindset. This is the work of the positive psychology researcher, Dr. Carol Dweck who goes into depth on this topic in her amazing book, Mindset. Through Dr. Dweck’s research, we know that children who have a growth mindset do better, achieve more and persevere through obstacles. All of these items will set them up for success.

Raising Confident Children

Here is one simple thing you can do that can help your child shift their thinking into a growth mindset.

Process Praise vs. Person Praise

When it comes to rewarding your child for accomplishing great things, remember to praise the process not the person. Person-centered praise is when you praise by labelling your child. For example, when your child gets a high mark on a math test, saying something like “You are brilliant! You are a genius!” is person praise. Now you are sending the message to your child that they are only those things because they did well. Person praise could promote a fixed mindset because you are attributing the outcome to them being smart – a fixed trait. In future, your child may shy away from approaching something challenging if they don’t think they will show up ‘brilliant’ or ‘genius’ because they always want to look good in your eyes.

To promote a growth mindset, you want to use process praise. That is, praising the hard work, the strategies they used and the resources they leveraged. This attributes the outcome to something they did – which promotes the idea they can do it again. It also takes the focus off of the outcome. The reason for this is because we know from all the academic literature it is not smarts or IQ that leads to success, it’s hard work and grit. You want to let your child know that with hard work and determination they are capable of achieving anything they set their mind to, helping improve their self-confidence.

Stay in Touch!

How do you encourage a growth mindset within your child? Let me know in the comments below! For other tips on how to build confident children, subscribe to my newsletter to receive my Weekly Juice directly to your inbox.

February 12, 2018

Raising Confident Children

Continuing with this month’s theme of raising confident children, in today’s Weekly Juice I walk you through how to shift your child from a pessimist mindset to an optimistic mindset in any given situation.

Now, this is not about turning your child into an optimist all the time. Sometimes we need a dose of pessimism in certain situations. For example, if your daughter becomes an airline pilot, I want her to be pessimistic about checking those wings one last time for ice. Pessimism just might save your life in this case. But for the most part, it’s important to instill a general, day-to-day dispositional optimism in your child’s life so that they feel confident that in general, things are working out for them. This optimistic outlook on life will help your child live a happier and healthier life. Another plus is that optimism fuels perseverance, one of the most important factors for achieving success.

Here are my tips on how you can help your child (and yourself) move from a pessimistic mindset to an optimistic mindset.

Permanent to Temporary

It’s important if your child faces failure that you encourage them to look at the situation as temporary. It’s not a reflection of who they are as a person and there is always room for improvement. One bad test score doesn’t mean that they will receive a bad grade on every test moving forward. You may even suggest to them to make a list of ways that they can improve so they have something to reference in the future.

Pervasive to Specific

Encourage your child to look at each failure individually. A bad test score in calculus does not mean that they are bad at math in general – it may just mean that they didn’t do so well on that particular test or that calculus is harder for them than algebra.

Personal to Non-Personal

Teaching your children to look at failure as non-personal will allow them to change their mindset from pessimist to optimist. Just because you fail at something, doesn’t mean something is wrong with you. It just means maybe you didn’t study hard enough, or you used the wrong strategy to approach the task. By making the failure non-personal you give your children hope that with a change in their approach, they can succeed.

Stay in Touch!

What are your tips for shifting your child from a pessimistic mindset to an optimistic mindset? Let me know in the comments below! For other tips on how to build confident children, subscribe to my newsletter to receive Your Weekly Juice directly to your inbox.

February 2, 2018

Your Weekly Juice Episode 29

Raising Confident Children

This month, I am focusing on how to raise confident children, so for the next four Weekly Juice episodes, I will offer you tips and advice on how to build your child’s confidence. If you don’t have children, these tips will be helpful to you too!

As parents, we never want to see our kids suffer and that makes it hard not to get involved in their lives and provide input when it comes to problem-solving. The issue with helping children solve their problems is that they will never believe that they are capable of doing it themselves. If they don’t believe that they are able to solve their own problems, they will become anxious and stressed every time something goes wrong. When you help build your child’s confidence in their own problem-solving abilities, you help teach them that even if something does go wrong, they possess the skills to find a solution.

Here is my step-by-step process on how to help build your child’s confidence so that they can become better at solving their own problems.

Ask

Ask your child to spend some time alone to think of 3 solutions to their problem. This allows them time to think about the best solution and plan the best course of action to solve their problem.

Listen and Brainstorm

Regroup with your child and let them explain each solution to you in detail. Listen to their explanations and help them brainstorm further. By doing this, you are teaching your child to problem solve and how to think for themselves while still guiding them to a good outcome. When you co-create a solution with your child, they are more likely to follow through because it was their idea in the first place.

Encourage

Encourage your child to choose the best solution based on the information they talked about with you. By encouraging so, you are building confidence and self-efficacy when it comes to problem-solving. Not to mention, they are going to feel pretty great about themselves knowing that they were able to come to a solution on their own.

Stay in Touch!

How do encourage your children to think for themselves? Let me know in the comments below! For other tips on how to build confident children, subscribe to my newsletter to receive my Weekly Juice directly to your inbox.

January 26, 2018

Your Weekly Juice Episode 28

In this episode of Your Weekly Juice, I interview my dear friend, Shannon Polly, Principal of Shannon Polly & Associates and Professional Certified Coach, who is expert on presentation skills and executive presence. After spending years as a professional actress, Shannon now shares her wisdom with her clients on how to fully engage with their audience and how to build confidence before giving a talk or presentation.

Here is a summary of Shannon’s 3 tips for overcoming your fear of public speaking:

1. Tension

Before giving your next presentation think about how do you manage your own tension in your body when you are standing in front of a group of people. Shannon encourages you not to see anxiety as a problem. Being nervous when public speaking is completely normal and is something many people struggle with. Focus on your breathing – breathe in through your nose and out through your mouth. Exhale twice as long as you inhale. By focusing on your breathing you are taking your focus away from your nerves.

2. Intention

What do you want your audience to think, feel or do after your presentation? Focus on the outcome and the information you are presenting this will help you better connect with your audience.

3. Attention

When giving a presentation, focus on your audience. You are more likely to combat your fear of public speaking when your attention is directed to others rather than yourself.

I’d Love Your Feedback

What are your tips for overcoming your fear of public speaking? Please leave them in the comments below!

Did you enjoy my book, Wire Your Brain for Confidence, The Science of Conquering Self Doubt? If so, would you mind leaving me a review onAmazon.com? I will be forever grateful. Thank you!

January 22, 2018

In this Weekly Juice, I interview my dear friend Dr. Elaine O’Brien, an expert in the psychology of health, positive medicine, and fitness. She also holds a doctorate in the (Positive) Psychology of Human Movement from Temple University. In this interview, I asked Elaine how exercise and movement can increase confidence levels.

Elaine has been an inspiration to me and thousands around the world so I hope you enjoy!

If you want more tips and tools on how to increase your confidence and live the life you have always wanted, be sure to read my book, Wire Your Brain for Confidence; the Science of Conquering Self-Doubt. Download the first chapter for free!

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You can't help but feel better about yourself after spending some time with Louisa. Her energy and enthusiasm is infectious, mix that with her engaging teaching style and you have the ideal learning environment for anyone interested in positive psychology. I have been blessed to learn from Louisa in a classroom and conference setting and I can honestly say that she has changed my life.

Glendale Reyes


Louisa was my instructor for The Flourishing Center's CAPP (Certificate in Applied Positive Psychology) course held in Toronto Canada. She was excellent in her delivery and included many different approaches to teaching and learning which helped me retain the information better than any other course I have taken. Her enthusiasm and commitment to her work is an inspiration and she is brilliant at w... (Read More)

Barbara Santen
Registered Midwife & Relationship Coach


Plain and simply speaking, you were a hit! Your morning keynote address set a meaningful, happy, and upbeat tone for the rest of the conference. Our staff responded to your presentation style and message because it is what we needed to hear and feel at this time. We are a great College, with great staff, and May is the end of a full and active year of classes and programs, successes and challenges... (Read More)

Brian Benn, M. Ed.
Associate Director, Organizational Development


Let me just say WOW, WOW, WOW!!! You are a pleasure and a joy! Everybody loved your presentation, your warmth, kindness, approachability, and collaborative approach! Thank you so much for a phenomenal conference. The afternoon portion was also fantastic and more intimate which was really lovely, and it got all of us to breathe and connect more with one another. I cannot wait until our next opportu... (Read More)

Annalise Iten
Director Job Search Program


Louisa has the unique ability to engage a diverse audience with her expertise, humour and engaging style. As our key note speaker she enlightened the audience on the science of happiness and how happiness effects our well-being. The feedback was overwhelmingly positive; guests were inspired and delighted to listen to such a knowledgeable professional about a topic that everyone craves to know more... (Read More)

Roz Baker
Project Director, Signature Events


Louisa's course: Building Personal Resilience for Clinicians and Frontline Workers has been very well received since we introduced it two years ago. Her fun and engaging style makes this one of our highest rated courses, and the information is such a critical addition to the participants self-care toolkit. While the material is completely grounded in science, the application of it is practical, ... (Read More)

Linda Hills
Executive Director


University of Toronto Scarborough

Louisa delivered a fantastic workshop on the topic of personal resilience and learning to embrace failure. Her session was refreshing, entertaining and very pertinent to our work with students. The strategies she provided are ones we can apply right away. Our time with her simply flew by! I highly recommend Louisa as she is both an expert on and shining example of the power of positive psychology.

Jen Tigno
Manager, Advising & Learning Skills Services, Academic Advising & Career Centre


Thank you again for another great webinar. You and Shannon are both so engaging. It is rare in a webinar to actually feel that we are all in the room together. Somehow you both pull it off with your deep knowledge, warmth and energy. Your sessions offer a lot of value. The content is clear and compelling, and the exercises are highly relevant and immediately useful. I’m really enjoying ta... (Read More)

Carolyn Meacher
Innovation Leadership Coach


Thank you so much for your presentation today—there was so much that was of great value –lots to think about. I worked with a client immediately following the webinar and used the “miracle question”—so much came out of that and it was perfect timing. Louisa, I found your presentation style is so engaging, provocative and yet relaxed and rich with information. Thanks again.

Marilyn Kisluk
Coach


Comments from two participants (faculty and staff): 1) I felt that the PD with Louisa Jewell really had an effect on me in a very positive way. I could not stop talking and thinking about her discussions for a week or more after. It had such an impact on me that I spoke to my friends about that PD. I feel that our school needs these kinds of reminders in order to put ourselves on track and keep ... (Read More)

Helen Gin
Middle School Principal


Thank you again so much for the excellent session! It is so valuable and pertinent and, as I mentioned at the beginning, theoretically grounded and also practical - a rare and wonderful combination.

Valerie Ward
Co-Developer and Owner


Your presentation to our parents was such a gift. Thank you. I have already had emails from parents who attended to say how grateful they are for what you shared with them. Your work is so important, and the way you distribute it with such grace and humour makes it accessible to so many.

Laurie Fraser
Character Integrator


Scotiabank

The workshop is very dynamic and time flies. It definitely gave me more consciousness of what I think, I feel, do and how I can do a much better job. The content is powerful and so are the exercises and resources provided. I do think that this is the first step to a happier, fulfilling life. I would love to take more workshops about this subject. Thank you Louisa so much for this opportunity. I ha... (Read More)

Brenda Bojorquez
Senior Manager


The flourishing 101 course was an eye opener. When you look for the positive around you, guess what you actually find more of the positive. It?s the power of intention. I discovered how I could use my top strengths to create more success in my personal life and career. Sometimes what we are naturally good at we take for granted. This course will change how you interact with others and bring more p... (Read More)

Sarah Clark
CPC Health Coach


I had long struggled with my lack of motivation and my fear of the world. I didn't have enough confidence in myself to start conversations with strangers or to try new things. I was unhappy with the small and empty way I was living my life and I wanted to make a change, but I didn't know how or if I could. I found the answers I was looking for in this course. It opened my eyes to the traps I was f... (Read More)

Collette Johns


I loved Louisa Jewell's Flourishing 101 workshop series. I learned so much about happiness, positivity and how to increase both. I have so many new tools to use and am able to refer to them whenever I need to. It's been extremely useful and I recommend it to anyone!

Kristy S. Simpson


It would have taken me months of independent study to learn what I have learnt in just six short weeks. The classes were lively, engaging and down to earth. The practical examples and stories made the research come alive. I especially loved the home happiness boosters turned my A-ha Moments into easy action steps with big impact. Flourishing 101 made a positive impact on my life and has given me ... (Read More)

Shirin Khamisa
Career counsellor & Certified ICF Coach


Thank you very much for taking the time to present to us here at Sterling Hall on Tuesday. I have had numerous teachers, parents, and administrators say what an incredible session it was. All of our brains are brimming with programming and activities we can implement both at home and at school to help our students and children realize their character strengths and use them to help build their resi... (Read More)

Erica Sprules
Manager


Thank you for a great course! It was a wonderful class - full of useful and thought-provoking information. And, I liked the balance of classroom learning (which I love) and some exercises to apply what we talk about. You are also able to handle all sorts of questions well. I was so curious - I hope I did not bombard you with too many questions as I was loving what we discussed and wanted to learn ... (Read More)

Steffi Black
Life/Career Coach & Kindness Advocate for Schools


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